Tuesday, September 30, 2008

It's not me, its you

Being more myself can get me into "trouble" with Joe Kou's friends and co-workers.

Speaking more as myself and less as who I allowed myself to be within the limitations of being Joe Kou, i find myself less and less concerned with reactions or even repercussions from others around me.

Really... I could care less. I truly and self honestly do not give a fuck. That is... when I am speaking as who I really am. Sometimes the Joe Kou syndrome kicks in and I start to edit my words so that I don't "offend" anyone... but when I am myself speaking my Living Words as an expression of my self honest being... I speak me, fearlessly.

And it is always interesting the reactions. Oh boy... those twisted, furrowed eyebrows, the faces agape with disbelief, the blank "i'm going to pretend i understand" expressions, and those "I can't believe you think that! How could you think that?!"

Why do I enjoy these reactions from people? It's because they are seeing something inside themselves which they are not honest about, and are confronting it by confronting me. So really, it's not me, it's them. I was only a mirror reflecting aspects of themselves.

And so, when I have reactions to people, I see it as them being mirrors for me, showing me what parts of me as Joe Kou are still hanging around, what parts of my limited and mentally programmed self are still operating.

So the next time you hear me say "FUCK YOU, YOU FUCKING FUCK!" don't get angry. It's not you, it's me.

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